Read these 13 Men and Women Tips tips to make your life smarter, better, faster and wiser. Each tip is approved by our Editors and created by expert writers so great we call them Gurus. LifeTips is the place to go when you need to know about Marriage tips and hundreds of other topics.
Have you ever considered how your husband resolves issues inside of himself. This is a generalization, but it has been my experience that men like to think about the solution and then talk about it. Many men don't talk through the problem, they come up with their solution and then they talk about it. If your husband is dealing with some issue I recommend that you give him some time to think and then he may be more likely to discuss the issue with you.
Recently, I have noticed that many women struggle with the lack of sensitivity to their feelings. Most of the women are complaining about the lack of kindness that their husband is showing them. Kindness is one of the keys to showing your wife how much you love her. Show a little more kindness by giving a compliment, doing something special, or telling her how much you appreciate her.
An evening out together can always bring a little more spark into your marriage. However, if you really want to make it a special evening do the planning in advance. Tell your wife that you will arrange the babysitter and plan the evenings events. Many women find this type of evening very romantic and appreciate not having to find a babysitter.
Unfortunately, many men don't know how to talk about what they need in a marriage. However, women seem to have an intuitive understanding of what pleases a man. If you want to please your husband, step back and analyze what excites your husband. What do you do that really pleases him? Once you have figured these questions act upon it. You will be surprised at how much more understanding you have about your husband. Trust your instincts!
If you don't have a to do list from your wife, you might want to check the pulse of your marriage. Most men have a to do list. If you cannot remember what your wife wants you to do make a list (if your "To Do" list goes past two pages ask your wife to rank order them). Once you have the list do them without your wife having to ask you.
While it is easy to get into the routines of work, housework, cooking, taking care of the children, doing the laundry, it is always nice to put a little spark back into your marriage. One way to do that is to plan a special meal where you and your husband can spend some time alone. Plan a time when you can put aside other concerns (i.e. find a babysitter) and prepare a candlelight dinner just for the two of you.
Sometimes men believe that a dozen roses and a night out will make a struggling marriage better. While this may work in some situations it won't always work. Creating a strong marriage requires more than just one night out with some roses. Our actions over time are much more effective. Many women have told me that they want more than a one time event. They want help around the house, with the children, and someone who will follow through with their promises.
What do you do when everything you have done isn't enough to help your wife deal with her feelings of frustration. First, don't take it personally. Second, avoid giving advice. Third, let your wife know you are there for her if she wants to talk. Fourth, be patient. Fifth, if steps one through four don't work, pray. Six, if steps one through five don't work start crying with them.
|Jennifer Mathes, Ph.D.|