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There are many times in which a relationship is not abusive, yet the couple still wonders if it is time to end things. One of the most important factors to consider is which has a better beneficial outcome, to repair or to replace?
Obviously, there is something missing if the couple is considering breaking up. Something is in need of fixing, change, and moving forward. It is then that both sides of the relationship need to determine a few factors.
To repair the relationship can be painful. You will most likely have to face a number of truths that will not exactly be pleasant, both about yourself and your partner. It will take time, energy and more to help put the relationship back on track. In fact, this could take weeks, months, or even years to do. It may be impossible. However, it is possible that you could end up with a better relationship than you had to begin with back when things were not strained.
To replace the relationship means ending it. It also means going through the steps of trying to find another suitable partner, including enduring the dreaded "dating scene." This, too, can take a great amount of time and has no guarantee of a positive outcome.
When deciding to either repair or replace your relationship, be realistic with yourself as to the steps that would need to be taken in each of these scenarios. By comparing and contrasting the two, you can decide if the relationship just needs to be repaired or whether it should ultimately be replaced with someone new.
|Jennifer Mathes, Ph.D.|