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August 8, 2008, Newsletter Issue #237: What is the Zap Rule in Communication?
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Tip of the Week
Many therapists use the "Zap Rule" in therapy with couples. So what is a "Zap?" A zap is anything that makes you feel as if you´re not being treated as an equal, or with dignity and respect, or as if you are being blamed, punished, or ridiculed. The rule requires that when either member of a couple is feeling zapped they can stop the conversation and ask that the last statement "a percieved zap" be restated by the person who made the comment. This requires that both partners be willing to respect their partners feelings.
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