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June 2, 2006, Newsletter Issue #127: Fighting Fair
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Tip of the Week
Learning to fight fair will save your marriage. Most couples have learned how to fight (below the belt). They have learned to fight by yelling, screaming, putting someone down, hitting, throwing things, etc. This type of fighting simply doesnīt work. In fact it ruins relationships. Fighting fair requires the following components.
1st) Avoid doing each of the things listed above. 2nd) Stay focused on one issue at a time. 3rd) Give your partner agency to not solve the problem right now (set up a later time if necessary, but make sure you agree on a time to solve the problem). 4th) Donīt just listen to what your partner is saying. Try to understand their reasons and pains. 5th) Admit to your mistakes. 6th) Have compassion and empathy for your partner.
Learning to fight fair can save your marriage.
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